Blog: I just don't understand what I've done wrong, that's all...
Me: Look, Blog, you're great. There's nothing wrong with you. This is all my fault, and I'm sorry you've been neglected.
Blog: But you've really done a lot this summer, right? But like, the whole month of August...completely blown off.
Me: Yeah... :::shamefacedly::: yeah...
Blog: And, really, all of that stuff in July? Bugs? As like, a motif? Really?
Me: I guess...I don't know. I was more just trying to capture the...I'm not sure...the quiet, idiosyncratic joy that people are still capable of even if they're alone. I think that can be beautiful.
Blog: Yeah, great. Let's cut the artsy fartsy BS, okay?
Me: Well, what do you want me to say?
Blog: I want you to get on that computer and tell people how you've been...how you had a great time in New York, walking through Central Park with Candice. And how you went houseboating for a week and jumped over ravines and hung out with BJ and Sahael and finally made it into the wakeboarding club. And how you've seen Kay and Nick this summer. And I want you to tell them how you've been doing yoga...and...taking walks in the evening and talking to your sister on the phone and that funny story about all those mishaps that happened when you had to get blood drawn the other day! Like when you squirted blood on that nurse by accident? That was a riot! I mean, you could mention the hours of reading and the constant nagging fear of your exam, too...but...really, it's been a month of bug stories and it's time to start with some of the stuff that's actually interesting.
Me: :::straight-faced::: Because all of that studying and worrying about my future is just completely unimportant.
Blog: Come on...
Me: No, you're totally right. Why didn't I think of that? You're so smart, Blog. I'm so glad your here to tell me what to do.
Blog: I didn't mean it like that.
Me: Yeah, no...I should just acknowledge that 80% of my life is completely unimportant and not worry that I can't even talk with my friends about what I'm doing because it's esoteric enough to sound meaningless.
Blog: My point is just that a lot has happened. There's no need to get moody about it. Wait...are you...?
Me: :::sniffle:::
Blog: Are you CRYING?
Me: No. :::passes palm over cheek and wipes nose::: Of course I'm not crying. That'd be silly.
Blog: Look, I just...
Me: It's okay. I know you're just trying to help. :::grabs fly swatter::: I have some...I'm just going to go take care of some of those houseflies in the kitchen to take my mind off of things for a little while.
Blog: Okay...
Me: Okay. :::starts to walk away from desk:::
Blog: :::pause::: Kat?
Me: Yeah?
Blog: That thing you do with the swatter... when you pretend that it's a sword and you're a fly-killing samurai? That's funny stuff, there.
Me: :::Nods, without turning around:::
Blog: Especially last week, when you told that one fly it was an "ignoble adversary who knew not the meaning of honor"...
Me: :::Brightening, and giving a half smile::: you think so?
Blog: Maybe...maybe you could write about that, when you're done?
Me: :::pause, turning back::: Yeah, Blog...I can do that.
Blog: I'll be here, then. Whenever you need...
Me: I know...I know.
[Kat walks off toward the kitchen with the swatter, where the sounds of thwapping, occasional victory cries, and The Flaming Lips' "The W.A.N.D." played through iPod earphones, continue as the scene closes.]
Me: Look, Blog, you're great. There's nothing wrong with you. This is all my fault, and I'm sorry you've been neglected.
Blog: But you've really done a lot this summer, right? But like, the whole month of August...completely blown off.
Me: Yeah... :::shamefacedly::: yeah...
Blog: And, really, all of that stuff in July? Bugs? As like, a motif? Really?
Me: I guess...I don't know. I was more just trying to capture the...I'm not sure...the quiet, idiosyncratic joy that people are still capable of even if they're alone. I think that can be beautiful.
Blog: Yeah, great. Let's cut the artsy fartsy BS, okay?
Me: Well, what do you want me to say?
Blog: I want you to get on that computer and tell people how you've been...how you had a great time in New York, walking through Central Park with Candice. And how you went houseboating for a week and jumped over ravines and hung out with BJ and Sahael and finally made it into the wakeboarding club. And how you've seen Kay and Nick this summer. And I want you to tell them how you've been doing yoga...and...taking walks in the evening and talking to your sister on the phone and that funny story about all those mishaps that happened when you had to get blood drawn the other day! Like when you squirted blood on that nurse by accident? That was a riot! I mean, you could mention the hours of reading and the constant nagging fear of your exam, too...but...really, it's been a month of bug stories and it's time to start with some of the stuff that's actually interesting.
Me: :::straight-faced::: Because all of that studying and worrying about my future is just completely unimportant.
Blog: Come on...
Me: No, you're totally right. Why didn't I think of that? You're so smart, Blog. I'm so glad your here to tell me what to do.
Blog: I didn't mean it like that.
Me: Yeah, no...I should just acknowledge that 80% of my life is completely unimportant and not worry that I can't even talk with my friends about what I'm doing because it's esoteric enough to sound meaningless.
Blog: My point is just that a lot has happened. There's no need to get moody about it. Wait...are you...?
Me: :::sniffle:::
Blog: Are you CRYING?
Me: No. :::passes palm over cheek and wipes nose::: Of course I'm not crying. That'd be silly.
Blog: Look, I just...
Me: It's okay. I know you're just trying to help. :::grabs fly swatter::: I have some...I'm just going to go take care of some of those houseflies in the kitchen to take my mind off of things for a little while.
Blog: Okay...
Me: Okay. :::starts to walk away from desk:::
Blog: :::pause::: Kat?
Me: Yeah?
Blog: That thing you do with the swatter... when you pretend that it's a sword and you're a fly-killing samurai? That's funny stuff, there.
Me: :::Nods, without turning around:::
Blog: Especially last week, when you told that one fly it was an "ignoble adversary who knew not the meaning of honor"...
Me: :::Brightening, and giving a half smile::: you think so?
Blog: Maybe...maybe you could write about that, when you're done?
Me: :::pause, turning back::: Yeah, Blog...I can do that.
Blog: I'll be here, then. Whenever you need...
Me: I know...I know.
[Kat walks off toward the kitchen with the swatter, where the sounds of thwapping, occasional victory cries, and The Flaming Lips' "The W.A.N.D." played through iPod earphones, continue as the scene closes.]
