God....restlessness? despair? what do I call it? I have no clue. I'm almost done everything for the semester, I just need to do a little more reading and take one final, and that's it...but everything hangs in the balance. Berkeley's grad. application stuff needs to be postmarked by the 10th...everything's done... excpet two little letters of recommendation that have not yet found their way to the career center...God....I dunno...I hate relying on other people. Why can't the fact that I turned everything else in on time count for something? I have to sit here squirming for two more days to see whether things get in on time, whether I can even APPLY to my number one choice for school. Everything else I can take. the homework, the anxiety, the parents, but not now. :::sigh::: Maybe I've done something wrong, but I'm not sure what.
And I don't want to do this again next year...